CJ+H’s+2016+OpEd+Article

AP: Altered Perception by CJ Haberbush A brief elegy for the AP students who have lost their way



Lickety spliff You’re hooked in a jiffy Once you start puffing It’s glue you’ll be huffing

One puff and you’re done Said the righteous old nun Nothing called innocent fun

But it’s the AP trend my dearest friend What does it matter what I do on the weekend? Our A’s are straight, Marijuana is great! Can our sanity this drug mend?

I’ll give the SAT a shot But I'm not feeling so hot After drinking that handle of whiskey

Grades are dropping? So it’s pills you’ll be popping! Don’t worry at all, have a few adderall It will work out in the end

You can pretend to be sitting so pretty But I see right through you With your face that is shitty Don't pretend that you don't drink too

Acid is dropping along with my grades We thought that we had it made I’ll have a ketamine while you do amphetamines Truly they’re tools of the trade

Have a few beers and we’ll shout out our cheers, for passing the AP test Never you fear in a couple of years, you’ll be the same as the rest