Rachel+C's+Op-Ed+Article

**Styrofoam: An Insulator of Horror**
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My skin prickles and my mouth makes an unattractive gaping face in reaction severe physical pain every time I hear that demonic manmade substance sing it's hellish screech, one that puts Michelle Bachmann to shame.

Styrofoam is disgusting; it's one of man's worst inventions, right behind the atomic bomb and the Bumpit.

I ask you, Dow Chemical Company, why? Why did you feel the need to invent something so aggravating and, in essence, useless? Do you enjoy torturing little kids and ruining the environment while you're at it? Are you that sadistic?

Tell me the perks of your product.

Is it your use of styrene, a classified carcinogen? No, it couldn't be.

The fact that your product is only the 5th largest creator of hazardous waste? Now, that really isn't something to brag about, is it?

Or maybe it's because your product is notorious for breaking into pieces that choke animals and clog their digestive systems. Oh, right, that's not a good thing either. Dow Chemical Company, styrofoam has no redeeming qualities, except, possibly, its cost effectiveness. But to be honest, I would rather carry my Chinese takeout home in my bare hands than have to use your goose bump inducing product; it really is that painful.

And let's not forget to add the fact that styrofoam isn't biodegradable to the list of why styrofoam shouldn't be used. According to the California Costal Commission, styrofoam accounts for a large portion of marine debris. And because it's so god damn buyount, it just floats around indefinitely - until some unsuspecting pelican mistakes it for its next meal.

And don't try to tell me that your product is necessary to pack the electronic appliances we covet. Because ask anyone, //anyone,// and they'll tell you that they would be so much more excited if their coffee maker was packed in bubble wrap, rather than styrofoam.

Ah, bubble wrap. Now there's a product with integrity (I mean, aside from the whole wasting plastic issue). While your product is annoying, theirs is captivating. And while your product causes ears to bleed, theirs causes an emanation of laughter.

So, you heartless sadists who insist on packing everything in styrofoam, I'm begging you to stop - to secure not only my sanity but the sanity of countless others. And if you continue to insist that styrofoam is the superior packing material, pack yourself in a room full of it and try to dig yourself out without going crazy. Then pack yourself in a room full of bubble wrap and tell me you didn't have an incredible time finding your way out.