Norint+T’s+OpEd+Article

 Skinny Jeans on Men

First and foremost, you cannot wear extremely tight skinny jeans! They are just wrong! You are constricting your ball sacks and suffocating the nuts of life!!!

Pants are meant to be comfortable and protective, not a fashion statement; especially for guys. Why would you want to put on a pair of these painfully grueling beasts? To look good? To show that you are a skater? Well you are absurd! These skintight jeans are performing much more damage to your nuts than you are receiving compliments on how nice the pants look. Anyways how could skinny jeans be good for skateboarding, don’t you need flexibility with your legs to do the tricks?

Many would say, skinny jeans are fine, you just have to sag them a “little”. But this brings us to another problem. These sagged pants are not a pleasant sight; no one wants to see your underwear.

Unless you are a girl, or don’t have balls, do not wear skinny jeans. They are awfully excruciating. Everything in the world needs some space; even your nuts. As Franz Kafka once said, “God gives the nuts, but he does not crack them”. Skinny jeans do.