Sarah+J’s+OpEd+Article

“Chewing Gum is Really Gross. Chewing Gum I Hate the Most.”

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To all of you Gum Smacking Smackers,

Have you ever seen what you look like with a wad of chewed up gum hanging out of your mouth? Or what you look like trying to speak while at the same time managing a piece of gum drifting around between your teeth with an overflowing collection of saliva? Well please, let me enlighten you. It is revoltingly unattractive, horrendously disgusting, and cheapening-ly tacky.

First of all, chewing gum is frankly unnecessary for anything other than the amusement of your mouth. Okay, perhaps it might relieve your mouth of its foul smelling odor, but only for about 10 chews. Then your gum begins to absorb the bad stink of your breath making it smell even worse than before! Of course then you think you must repeat the process, but all it leaves you with is bad breath and a never ending cycle of chewing gum, (which in turn makes you look and smell disgusting).

Do I even have to mention the sound? Snap, crackle and pop has no positive connotation here. Nobody wants to hear you wrestle gum with your tongue in a pool of your own saliva. It is gross and annoying. Not to mention how trashy it makes you look. I don’t care if you are the most respectable and intelligent person on this earth, as soon as a piece of gum enters your mouth and the symphony of smacking begins, your class and IQ drop to that of Snooki’s.

If you absolutely just HAVE to chew some gum, please spare us all, and at least do it with your mouth closed… in the privacy of your own room.